Week 3:
Off ill (surprise, surprise)

Wednesday:

Wednesday morning I woke with what was an, ‘oh so familiar’ feeling, I couldn’t get out of bed from the pain in my back and abdomen.
I text Steve to let him know I wouldn’t be in, took some pain killers and nodded off back to sleep.

When we were assigned this year long blog assignment, Steve asked us not to make it too personal, more explanative and to the point. Unfortunately, because of the condition I have, there will be times when, frankly, I have nothing better to talk about so I apologise in advance. And,I’m afraid, this is one of those times……
So, Wednesday, I stayed in bed most of the day. Ok, all of the day, there’s probably only me reading this so I’ll tell the truth! Luckily I have an amazing family who look after me when I’m ill so I don’t have to get out of bed.
Due to the strong pain killers, I slept a lot too. When I was awake though, and I thought about college, I got that sickly feeling, like before you go on a big ride, (or when you get off it!!) nervousness and anticipation and I wasn’t sure why. Was I scared of what I’d miss? Of falling behind? I think my main concern was what Steve was thinking. He’s very clued up on people and did he think I was giving up already? After I’d been so honest in my formative statement about giving up on things in the past, I really didn’t want him to think I was doing it again, especially after that particular part of my statement had been brought up in previous conversation. I’d assured him that that wasn’t me anymore and that I had chosen this course for me, so it wasn’t some piss about way of passing the time, plus I was paying for it!
I know myself, and I know I will not give up this course. But when you’re not sure what someone else is thinking about your situation, someone who matters anyway, you start to doubt yourself. I decided I would call him on Thursday.

Thursday:
First priority, call Steve.

Thursday morning I knew the other students would be getting on with the assignment so Steve would be in the office so I rung him as early as I could. He sounded pleased to hear from me but said I sounded awful, which was nice seen as I was feeling a little better! Anyway, after speaking to him I felt much better about college and what he was thinking, and the sickly feeling went. He told me the first priority was to get better, closely followed by getting my blog done! Ha! I told him I’d try and get into college for our weekly group meeting. I didn’t make it because I was sleeping and carried on doing all day!
During the evening I text Rich, asked to borrow his book so I could copy what I’d missed. He dropped it off before he went to work and picked it up afterwards. I thought how nice it was and that I’d have to remember it and thank him properly.